s4h-writing-line-editing
Writing: Line Editing
Line editing addresses mechanical failures at the sentence level — the problems that make competent writing feel clunky, slow, or airless. These are distinct from prose quality problems (which /s4h-writing-prose-elevation addresses): line editing is about removing what is broken, not elevating what is merely flat.
Five failures account for the majority of sentence-level problems:
Redundancy: Saying the same thing twice, either in the same sentence or in adjacent sentences. Often invisible to the writer because the repetition feels like emphasis or clarity.
Nominalisation (zombie nouns): Converting verbs and adjectives into noun forms, burying the action inside the noun. "Made a decision" instead of "decided." "Had a realisation" instead of "realised." "Conducted an investigation" instead of "investigated." Every nominalisation costs one verb, reduces clarity, and adds bureaucratic weight.
Agency-obscuring passive voice: Not all passive voice is wrong — "Mistakes were made" is passive, but sometimes the subject genuinely isn't known or relevant. The problem is passive voice that obscures who did what, when the agent matters: "The decision was made to cut the programme" when the sentence needs to say who cut it.
Rhythmic monotony: All sentences the same length. All sentences starting the same way. A page that reads like a manual because every sentence is a main clause, subject-verb-object, approximately fifteen words, followed by another exactly like it. Rhythm variation creates pace, emphasis, and the sense of a living mind behind the prose.
Throat-clearing: Opening sentences or paragraphs that warm up before landing. "It is worth noting that the situation has certain characteristics that make it worth considering." The sentence starts before the writer has found the point. The actual sentence starts at "the situation."